Ibnul-Qayyim
Al-Jawziyyah رحمه الله said:
And Al-Bayhaqi narrated from the
hadeeth of Anas رضي
اللّه عنـه who
said that:
'A man was sitting
with the Prophet, so one of his sons came to him, so the man kissed him and sat
him in his lap. Then his daughter came to him so he took her and sat her to his
side. So the Prophet (صلّى اللَّهُ عليه وسلّم) said, ‘You were not just between
them.’ And the Salaf used to like to be just between their
children when kissing them.'
And some of the people of knowledge
said that Allaah سُبحانه
وتعالى will ask the parent about
his child on the Day of Resurrection before asks the child about his parent. So just as the
father has a right upon his son, the son has a right upon his father, as Allaah
سُبحانه
وتعالى said,
وَوَصَّيْنَا
الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حُسْنًا
“And We have enjoined on man to be
good and dutiful to his parents..”
[Al- ‘Ankabut:8]
Allaah سُبحانه وتعالى
said,
يَا
أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواقُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا
“Ward off from yourselves and your
families a Fire whose fuel is men and stones..”
[At-Tahreem:6]
Ali bin Abi Taalib رضي اللّه عنـه said,
“Teach them and discipline them!”
And Allaah سُبحانه وتعالى said,
وَاعْبُدُواْ
اللّهَ وَلاَ تُشْرِكُواْ بِهِ شَيْئًا وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا
“Worship Allaah and join none with
Him in worship, and do good to parents..”
[An-Nisaa:36]
And the Prophet صلّى
اللَّهُ عليه وسلّم said,
“Be just between your children.”
So Allaah’s order to the parents towards their children precedes the order to the children towards their parents.
Allaah سُبحانه وتعالى said,
وَلاَ
تَقْتُلُواْ أَوْلادَكُمْ خَشْيَةَ إِمْلاقٍ
“And kill not your children for fear
of poverty..”
[Al-Israa':31]
So the one who neglects teaching his
child that which will benefit him, and leaves him [i.e. the child] in vain,
then he has wronged him in the most utmost way. And
indeed most children’s corruption came from their parents and their neglect of
them and their failure to teach them the obligations of this Religion and its
Sunan. They caused the children to be lost while they were young, so
they do not benefit themselves or their parents when they grow older just as
some fathers criticized their son over him being undutiful, so he would say:
“O father, you were not dutiful to me
while I was young, so I was not dutiful to you while you are older; you
neglected me while younger so I neglected you as an old man.”
{Taken
from: Tuhfat Al-Mawdood Bi Ahkaam Al-Mawlood, pgs. 160-161 (Chapter 15: “The
Obligation of Disciplining the Children and Teaching Them, and Being Just
Between Them.”)}
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