Letters To My Precious Mother... (4)

 

Dammaj - view of the mountains

A new house to live in... so cozy and compact.. reminding me of the cottage of the three little bears visited by Goldilocks. Hmm....... it's going to take some time.. may be a little longer time to get used to. Could see so much of excitement and joy in Abdullah's face as he took me for a tour of the house. At this point in time amidst all the joy of being in Dammaj and being united as a family.. there is a missing link ... a very precious link which CANNOT be ever substituted.... 'the womb that bore me... My Ummi.. My mother...' and of course the ones who shared the same womb.. my sister and brother. HOMESICK BIG time..!!

Uncontrollable tears poured down both Hasna's cheeks and mine... missing family, friends.. my two little lambs (my nieces Huda, Haajar & my nephew, my sister-in-law Hafsa who is more than a sister to me… It was like a dam had been let loose.. Well time for a quick check on our niyyah (intention)…SubhanaAllaah the matter of intention is one that can change our lives, for the better or for the worse. I had to keep reminding myself the very purpose why we came here and this eased our emotions a teeny weeny bit. It’s not easy leaving loved ones behind for the sake of Allaah.. it made us think about the time our beloved Prophet Muhammad (sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam) & the Sahabah (RadiAllaahu anhum) who made Hijrah. They left everything behind for the sake of Allaah (azzawajal). In fact what we are going through is nothing compared to their sacrifices. Well, Paradise is indeed expensive and many many sacrifices have to be made along with a lot of Hard work on our part.

 Delicious Grapes of Dammaj

In fact consciously checking our actions for Ikhlaas (sincerity) in all our actions should be an ongoing thing i.e until our soul leaves our body. This is an advice given by our noble Sheikh Yahya Al-Hajoori (may Allaah preserve him). How true!! If our intentions for every action of ours is not perfected for the sake of Allaah (azzawajal) alone, our deeds, our struggle all are in vain. Only if we consciously strive to make every act we do every day of every moment will we truly begin to realize the meaning of the verse: 

﴿وَمَا خَلَقْتُ الْجِنَّ وَالإِنسَ إِلاَّ لِيَعْبُدُونِ ﴾

(And I created not the Jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me.)

 Adh-Dhariyat (51:56)

Hmm.. with the intention on check.. the next thing is al-Ihtisaab (consciously seeking the reward of Allaah with good deeds). This makes one feel good since our struggle and pain are not without a reward from our Most Generous Lord, Allaah (subhanahu wa ta’ala). So I had to pull myself together desiring the reward of Allaah and seeking His Face, The Mighty and Majestic and at the same time making fervent Dua that Allaah grants my dear family and friends the opportunity to come to this blessed land.

I begged my Rab to make this transition easy for me and my family…

To be continued bi’ithnillaahi…